Wednesday, June 28, 2017

062817b



Planting with Fire

It's never wise
to feed Miracle-gro
to carnivorous plants
give them too much lime
they'll grow a second set of teeth
it's tempting
to feed them scraps
when you grill, but don't
whatever you do
cut yourself on their
sharp-edged leaves
you will have to put them down
like man-eating tigers
if you can

062817



Happy 13,000,000,000th


1. Yahweh.
Just Me. And the Cat.
I'm retired.
Worked for 6 kalpas in Fundamental Constant maintenance.
Enough to get by.
Tea? It's My special blend.
My hobby is gardening. Continua just happen.
Once I had to fumigate the entire house with Spacetime Dissipator.
An accident.
Pot boiled over while I was out weeding firmaments.
Bean soup. All fresh ingredients from my Garden. Delicious.
Missed a spot when I cleaned up. They expand so quickly in the first few microseconds!
11? Collapse Me! It was only 5 dimensions to start with.
Life already?! Don't that beat all.
Last time I looked the first matter was forming.
Complex ecosystems, terrestrial organisms, tool use? I'm flabbergasted.
I have certainly been remiss.
Should have cleaned it up long ago.
My only excuse is that I stay out in the Garden until dark.
By the time I've made dinner, I'm ready to rest.
But I really need to clean the stove soon.


Publ. Daily Cabal, 2010

Tuesday, June 27, 2017

062717c



On worm world, everything is made of, or from, worms. This is not all to the good, but plumbing and water treatment occur simultaneously, as the pipes clean anything out of the water they can catch, for their own sustenance. An important downside: if you flush very much poison down the drain, even your pipes may die. You may replace them, but worms talk, and they remember. If you don't treat your pipes right, you may never get clean water again.

062717b



On Remodeling

the paper behind the molding
unearthed after a lifetime
bears a name and a smudge
"Lane"
dashed off in pencil
surname, or given?
person, or corporation?
place to stay in or stay out?
lives could revolve around this
and not just microscopic ones
that of this poem, f'r instance

062717




Handbag


"Jordan! Did you pick the cat up from the vet ?" he looked startled, then guilty, then pushed the door shut with his foot. Sounded like she was in the kitchen. That meant it had been a hard day for her, which was always bad news.

"Uh, no. I forgot. I'll do it tomorrow." He rolled his eyes, then headed for the kitchen.

"Tomorrow is Saturday. They're closed on the weekend. You can't get her till Monday, which is a holiday. So you can't get her till Tuesday. That's 75 bucks room and board. I'm getting just a little tired of this." She was wearing her "get out!" apron and holding a spatula. Batter dripped onto the floor.

"In fact," she continued, "I am tired of it." Donna picked Jordan up and dropped him in her purse, which stood open on the table.

Inside, Jordan fell a considerable distance, landing heavily on a red compact. He sat up, rubbing the back of his head. There was a sizable amount of room, far more than he had expected. In the dim light he saw keys, lipstick, a pencil stub, crumpled pieces of paper, and other things not immediately identifiable. Then he noticed the people. A couple of Jehovah's Witnesses, their starched shirts looking a bit rumpled; someone who might have been a repair man or meter reader; a cop; a couple of teenage boys; a well-built young woman with a head full of red ringlets. No wonder he hadn't been able to get her on the phone.

"Oh wow, Gloria! How long have you been in here?"

"Since the day you cheated on Donna, but told me you weren't seeing anyone."

Jordan reached for her shoulder, but she stepped back "Get your hands off me. I think you've done enough already. I just thank God we used a condom."

Jordan let his arm fall to his side and looked away to avoid Gloria's glare. He noticed four guys slumped around a card table in the shadows. "Who are they?"

"Other former boyfriends. She sure can pick 'em."

"What do you--? Oh." Jordan closed his mouth, and they stared at each other.

Darkness fell with a snap.

"What's going on?" Jordan cried, unable to keep panic entirely out of his voice.

"Brace yourself."



Publ. Daily Cabal, 2009

Monday, June 26, 2017

062617c



him in his Armani
suit with extra arm holes
buying Earth for Sqinux
his nephew by assimilation
for target practice

062617b



Alien in the Kitchen


First, the Visitor:
sniffing the jars
bottles and so on,
sampling cabinet doors.

Squeezin’ the cook
paper-towel roll too
grabbing onto the walls
stressing them peculiarly.

Next was the Visitor
wafting through the house
poking the dog/guppy/armoire
rummaging intrusively

Then was the Visitor
slapped on the cutting board
Earl’s hand engulfing
its wriggling-tentacled head

Simmering bubbling
abanging the lid
holding its breath
and staying quite tough

The meal, a powerful
passel of chewing
swallowing in extremis
ended at last

Lastly, the Visitor
bending their bowels
reconstituting its body
most grievously.